Kisses
by Talk Out Loud
Summary: Few and far between, but never unwelcome. RLSB, a little fluffy, multiple eras, rating on the safe side for later chapters.
1. The New Dorm

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. The boys are all JKRs.

**A/N**: Sorry about the really lame title. I got all uncreative when it came time to naming this puppy.

Three excited young boys stand in their new dorm which they realize is to be their new home for the next seven years. A fourth boy sighs dramatically and throws himself onto a bed, his long, black hair scattering across the pillows. He mutters something about his mother, Slytherin house, and the impending death of a remarkably handsome, well-mannered, pureblood boy.

The three boys smile at each other and talk lightly of their families after introducing themselves.

One of the boys, thin and sandy haired, looks over to the other boy, still moping on the bed he's claimed as his. He is not quite sure what to do to make him feel welcome. He pats his pockets and is relieved to find a piece of chocolate left over from his train ride.

"Would you like some chocolate?" the sandy haired boy says as he makes his way to the head of the other boy's bed.

"What kind?" the boy asks.

"Dark," he begins, "but I also ha--"

"My favorite." the dark haired boy smiles a kind smile and sits up in his bed.

"Mine, too." he replies, smiling back at the boy as he hands him the piece of chocolate. "I'm Remus Lupin." he introduces, while holding out his right hand.

"Sirius. Black." the boy says and instead of shaking his hand, lightly tugs on the Remus' outstretched wrist, bringing his face closer, and kisses Remus on one cheek, and then the other.

Remus is taken aback by the gesture, but figures it is perfectly normal for Sirius, being apparently pureblood, so he just goes with it. "Care to join us?" he holds a hand out into the general direction of the two other boys who are sitting on the floor: the slightly pudgy blond haired boy laughing at a story the myopic, wild haired boy had just told.

Sirius just smiles and nods. He takes a bite of his chocolate and hops off his bed to join the others. Remus goes to his trunk and gathers some more chocolate to share with his new friends. While he is turned, he doesn't see Sirius shake the hands of "Peter Pettigrew" and "Potter. James Potter."

To be continued...


	2. The Blanket

Dawn breaks over the Shrieking Shack with a low, pained howl.

A few hours later a bright streak of autumnal light flows through a crack in the wall and lands on the closed, sleeping eyes of a young boy of twelve. He winces and tries to escape the light, wanting nothing more than to sleep just a little longer, but the damage is done--he is awake.

Remus moans quietly and stretches his arms out in front of him. He is startled to find a blanket over him. He knew he hadn't brought one with him the night before. He hadn't the time, he'd been too busy finishing his Potions essay before the necessary trek toward the Willow before sundown to remember. He opens his eyes and looks around the room. In the corner nearest him he finds a folded pile of his own clothes. Next to the clothes he finds a boy no older than himself, sitting with his knees to his chest, sleeping. The boy's black hair drapes over his face, which is being held up by his hand. Remus smiles and brings the blanket up to his cheek as his eyes begin to feel damp. No one but his parents had ever stayed up all night or at least woke up before dawn to check on him in the morning. He is overcome with emotion and wants to cry.

Remus clears his throat loudly in an attempt to wake his friend. It works.

Sirius opens his eyes and sees Remus gesturing at the blanket. "Did you…?"

"Huh? Oh, I…" Sirius begins. "I thought you might be cold."

Remus says nothing, but instead just smiles.

"Here, eat some of this." Sirius digs through the pocket of his robes and holds out some chocolate for his friend. "It's dark. I know it's your favorite."

Remus secures the blanket around his waist and crawls over to join Sirius. He takes the chocolate and with the first bite begins to cry. Sirius holds open his arms and Remus fits his own around Sirius' waist and rests his head on his chest. He's never had someone like Sirius before--a friend. A _best_ friend.

Sirius holds Remus by the shoulders and says nothing. He simply finds a spot on Remus' head and kisses it, lightly but deliberately.

To be continued...


	3. The Lake

**A/N**: Inspired by prompt #14 from the August '07 prompting session on the LJ community 'barefootboys.'

"Remus, Remus wake up! Get your trunks on, mate, we're going swimming! Come on! James and Peter are already downstairs. Come on, come on!" Sirius exclaims.

"Uugh," Remus moans amongst some incoherent mumbles as he is being dragged out of his bed. He reluctantly obeys after a promise of breakfast. He follows Sirius down to the first floor who seems to have made it to the floor below with out as much as a toe on the stairs.

Once in the kitchen, Remus greets the Potters good morning and groggily picks up two pieces of toast from the table.

"Okay, you have food now, let's go!" Sirius grabs Remus at the wrist and begins dragging him out the back door. "Bye, Mr. and Mrs. Potter! We'll be back for dinner!" Remus barely finds time to wave his good-byes before the door closes behind them.

"Shrow down, Shiriush." Remus begs through his toast.

Remus finishes what he would hardly call a breakfast by the time they reach the small lake. James and Peter are already having a splashing fight in the water. Sirius lets go of Remus' wrist and runs over to the pier and jumps off the edge with a great yell of "Cannonball!"

Remus walks warily to the end of the pier. He would like to jump off and into the water, he really would, but a mixture of fear and sleepiness prevents him from doing so.

"Come on! The water's fine! What are you waiting for?" he hears James say from the water below.

The sound of wet footsteps on old wood come up from behind him. "Do you want me to go with you, Remus?" Sirius says as he plants his feet next to his friend. "I promise it's not that bad."

"You also promised breakfast. Eggs. Bacon. Sustenance. Do you remember that?" Remus glares.

Sirius just laughs and smiles at him.

Remus sighs. "Fine." A smile tugs at the edges of his lips.

"On, three, okay?" Remus nods at him. "One, two, three!"

They make a run for the end of the pier. They allow the liberating feeling of their feet leaving solid ground to overpower the feeling of butterflies in their stomachs. A small "Ahh!" escapes Remus' lips before he hits the water.

As they sink to the bottom of the lake, time seems to move slower. Remus opens his eyes to find Sirius staring back at him, smiling wildly. Remus smiles back at him. Sirius' smile has always been quite infections. Sirius closes the foot or two between them and kisses Remus square on the nose, smiles again, and makes his way to the surface. Remus blinks a few times before he too pushes his way to the bright summer air.

The four young marauders make it back to the Potter's just as James' mother is setting the dinner plates on the table.

To be continued...


	4. The Costumes

Sirius bounces out of the bathroom with a grin that anyone other than his closest friends would have probably called evil.

"Sirius, what in the name of Merlin's pointy hats are you wearing." James shudders, slightly shocked by what he is seeing.

"Whatever it is, he seems quite pleased with himself." Peter tries to reassure.

"They're… tights. Sirius, what--?" Remus tries not to make a face before he's cut off.

"Correct, Remus! _Purple_ tights! It's for my costume tonight." Sirius rests his fisted hands on his nylon wrapped hips.

"Who are you going as? McGonagall?" James quips.

"No, as a matter of fact. I didn't want her to feel bad if I pulled off that hideous hat of hers better than she could (and I would)." Sirius smiles wildly at his friends. "No, mates, Remus will be quite proud of me! I will be going as a great, timeless, and might I add quite handsome figure from Muggle literature."

"I didn't know you had an interest in Muggle literature." Remus says.

"What will be my punishment if I tell you I sneak a book or two from your library every once in a while?" Sirius bats his eyelashes at Remus.

Remus raises an eyebrow and tries not to let the words of his friend contort his pursed lips into a smile as he rolls up a near by piece of parchment as if it were a newspaper. "Well, that explains a few things… but as long as you don't touch my chocolate, you shall be spared."

"Aw, you tease!" Sirius pouts as Remus stops hitting his palm with the rolled parchment.

A few hours later finds the boys in the Gryffindor common room mingling amongst some other fourth years.

James has put on some simple black dress robes and combed his thick, wild hair as best he could so it fell along his collar in the back and just so it tickled his eyelashes in the front. He carries an acoustic guitar on his back. "John Lennon," he says, grinning despite his failing attempt to impress a red haired, green eyed, black cat with his knowledge of the Muggle world, or at least some of it's better music.

Peter has his same old sheet draped over his head for the fourth year in a row. In first year, he had forgotten to bring, transfigure, or buy a costume in time for the annual feast in the Great Hall and the following party in Gryffindor tower. Remus told him about a Muggle Halloween cartoon in which one of the characters threw a sheet, with two holes for eyes, over his head and tried to pass himself off as a ghost. Figuring that this would be the easiest option at such short notice, Peter tore a sheet off his bed and charmed two circles out of it. Peter had done the same in second and third year, having forgotten again. This year, however, he didn't even bother making a fuss, claiming it was "tradition" and he couldn't let down the fans, no longer wanting to admit to his forgetfulness.

Remus adjusts the collar of his costume. "And who are you supposed to be?"

"Well, I'm," Remus turns around and meets Sirius' smiling face. "Dear Merlin, Sirius."

"Merlin? I think Merlin would have worn something a little more… flashy. Sorry, mate." Sirius poked at his friend's costume.

"Who the hell _are_ you?"

"I," Sirius began dramatically. "am The Prince!"

"I don't think a prince would wear trousers that are quite that puffy." Remus pokes cautiously at his hip, afraid that the over abundance of deep purple fabric might engulf him whole. "Are you smuggling balloons under there?"

A small pout showed up on his face for a split second, but vanished as soon as it had appeared. "He could have worn them on laundry day. I am The Prince on laundry day! And you are, mate?"

"I'm just a humble peasant." Remus drops his voice a bit, "Boring, but it was easy. It's just some over worn stuff from my closet that I haven't worn in ages. I didn't have a chance to pick up anything in Hogsmeade last week because of, well, you know." He makes a small howl that only the two of them can hear.

Sirius nods and smiles at him.

"So, which Prince are you exactly. You said a great and timeless,"

"And handsome!"

"…character from Muggle literature."

"The Prince from The Prince and the Pauper, of course." Sirius smiles after answering unusually shyly, but still as matter-of-factly as ever.

Remus stares at him. _'He couldn't possibly have planned this…'_

Picking up his invisible bag of dramatics he always seemed to carry with him, Sirius kneels down in front of his friend, grabs hold of his hand and says, "It is awfully horrible being such a handsome prince. Will you trade places with me, oh, delightfully shabby, yet equally as handsome kindred spirit?"

"Do I really look shabby?" Remus asks, quite proud of his convincing costume.

Sirius kisses the hand he is holding, "The shabbiest."

Remus can't help but flash a smile. "Maybe later. You can be my costume partner, though, if it means that much to you."

Sirius jumps up smiling. "Only if I can wear your hat. I just _adore_ patchwork." Sirius sweeps his long fingers across the small bill of the newsboy hat.

Before Remus can protest, Sirius steals his hat and replaces it with his own sparkling crown.

"Hey, wait up!" Remus calls after Sirius who is already halfway across the common room.

To be continued...


	5. The Library

"Bugger! This will be the death of me." Remus moans grudgingly at his text books.

"Is that my Moony, finally admitting he's been defeated by his beloved books? I never thought I'd see the day." Sirius asks as he pokes his head out from behind a bookcase.

"No, not yet. Just a temporary moment of weakness while reloading my ammo. I refuse to go down without a decent fight." Remus says, matter-of-factly.

"Potions?" Sirius asks, taking up a chair next to his friend.

"I'm rubbish and OWLs are in less than two months." Remus looks quite defeated despite his previous threats.

"OWLs are ages from now, Moonyface. Rubbish or not, you've got plenty of time. Come out to Hogsmeade with me, James and Pete."

"Easy for you to say. You barely crack your books and are brilliant in everything." Remus moans.

"Moony, I can hardly help if I was born this brilliant. Jealousy doesn't suit you." Sirius manages to curse his family in blood with one simple mocking flip of his hair.

"Son of a bitch," Remus smirks.

"That I am. That reminds me, I must investigate what it was exactly that crawled up her arse and _died _all those years ago, so I know to steer clear of it. I hope it's not hereditary." Sirius smiles playfully then adds in a more serious tone, "Let me help you study, Rem."

Remus sighs in reply, wondering if the sentence was declarative or interrogative.

"Come on, Moony, it'll be fun," Remus can hear the smile in Sirius' voice while he watches him wink playfully and nudge him in the arm.

Remus lets his head lean forward in defeat knowing that Sirius won't take, "No" for an adequate answer until he hits the desk with a louder than expected "thud."

Sirius smiles and gently takes Remus' chin in his hand and lifts up his head. He presses his lips lightly to the middle of the growing red spot on his forehead. "Tonight. Nine o'clock. Right here. I'm getting you a passing Potions grade. Oh, and we're leaving the common room in fifteen minutes." Remus just watches, expressionless as his friend smiles at him and walks out of the library as if he there were springs built in to his feet.

To be continued...


	6. The Portrait Hole

Remus likes the halls of Hogwarts best at Christmas time. The decorations warm a spot inside of him that he finds, ironically, is only warm in this cold, nippy weather. He loves the smiles, the food, the cheer in the air, the garland, the trees, even the mistletoe, as devious as it always was.

Remus doesn't have much to worry about, though. He has had decent luck with the mistletoe in the past. He manages to stay on his toes and maps out with in the first day or so of their first appearance where the danger lurks. He steers clear quite easily, but that is not to say he has not been caught once or twice. Remus remembers the run in with that Mackenzie girl from Hufflepuff three years ago. It was the first time he'd kissed a girl and it was horrible, not just because he was a rubbish kisser due to inexperience, but because he was thirteen and awkward and intimidated and she was, too, and he hadn't realized that seventeen is a few times too many to lick one's lips before going in for the kill.

He shudders remembering how awkwardly horrible he felt the rest of that night while keeping an eye out for the cunning plants he'd finished charting a few nights prior. He isn't too worried though, not many people are out this late since it _is_ Christmas Eve and most people went home for the holiday or are already in bed in their dorms, wanting an understandably early start on the impending day.

Remus rounds the corner and stands back from the painting guarding the entrance to the Gryffindor dormitories as he says the password, knowing that a bundle of mistletoe has set up it's home right at the top of the portrait hole. As the portrait opens, Remus backs up a little, _'Three of four meters should do nicely,'_ he tells himself.

"Oi, Remus!" his friend waves, looking as though he was just about to leave through the portrait hole.

"Sirius." Remus' face softens and smiles lightly, making his way forward to enter the common room.

"Boys!" a voice calls happily from above. Remus winces as if he has just stubbed his toe on the leg of a particularly heavy table.

'_Bugger!'_ He has forgotten all about the pesky plant now hovering above his sandy head and Sirius' long black locks.

"'Ow are we this evenin'? Lovely night for a nice smooch, eh? 'At reminds me, Christmas Eve, i'n't it?"

They both look up and nod at the damning plant.

"I wish the little buggers didn't talk." Sirius whispers to Remus in a way that can't be heard by the mistletoe. Remus chuckles breathily as he rubs the back of his neck nervously.

"Where are you headed to?" Remus asks; stalling an on looker would say.

"Me? Uh, oh, I was going to go and coax some pudding out of the house elves in the kitchen. Thought we could share a bowl later," Sirius smiles. "The four of us." he adds after a pause. "Where are you coming from?" he asks, seeing the small stack of books under his friend's arms, knowing the obvious answer.

"Just getting in some studying so I don't have to worry about it later," Remus replies.

"Good… good idea. Always on the ball--er, on top of things--I mean," a red tint makes its way onto Sirius' cheeks. "You've very smart. To be getting in some quiet study time."

Sirius stares at his friend intently as his blush fades. Butterflies multiply in Remus' stomach with each passing second that Sirius fails to blink.

"Get on with it, then! It's only a kiss. You're not askin' for 'is 'and in marriage. _Really_, kids are so nervous 'ese days," the mistletoe urges.

"Err, I guess we should…" Sirius begins.

"Yeah." Remus agrees, beginning to close the gap between them.

"I'm kind of afraid of what will happen if we put it off much longer…" Sirius tries to continue. Both are unsure if he is talking about the consequences the mistletoe will bring, or perhaps something else. Something bigger than the mistletoe. Something bigger than books and pudding. Something bigger than themselves. Sirius steps forward.

"Yeah." Remus agrees again, being rendered monosyllabic by the situation he is unable to contribute much more than that.

Remus licks his lips quickly, once this time, and closes his eyes now that he can feel Sirius' breath mingling with his own. It feels like days before any contact occurs between the two, until--

"Oh, ouch." Remus rubs the tip of his nose.

"Merlin, I'm--I'm sorry," Sirius says while holding his hand up to his own nose and staring with worried eyes at Remus.

'_This boy,' _Remus thinks, _'never, ever blinks.'_

"No, no, it… it's not your fault. It's nn--" Remus begins nervously but is cut off when he feels Sirius' lips firmly on his own. He breathes in deeply, inhaling the scent of his best friend, a scent he knows all too well. He slips out of reality courtesy of the smell of the night's feast, his own chocolate, elegance, defiance, and, most prominently, dog, not noticing Sirius adjust his footing to close what is left of the gap between them. Remus feels something grip the bottom of his loose tie. In response he unknowingly parts his lips just enough to allow Sirius to nibble and suck gently on his bottom lip. He feels the other boy bring one of his hands up to his face, the warm thumb of Sirius rubbing lightly at a scar on his cheek, and the long, elegant fingers tickling around his earlobe and neck. It makes Remus' arm drop the books it once held to help his hands find their way around Sirius' waist, or maybe between his shoulder blades, or perhaps tangled in Sirius' hair.

Remus comes back down to earth when he realizes the dizziness he's feeling is being caused by a lack of oxygen. He pulls away, exhaling deeply through his nose. Their eyes meet, staring for what seems to be the hundredth time. Faint smiles rest on both their lips.

"Jolly good, boys! 'At wa'n't so bad now was it? Enjoy your evenin', then!" the mistletoe laughs and scopes out his next victims.

"I, uh, gotta go, and uh," Remus points vaguely in the direction of their dorm, and then to his arm where his books are supposed to be. "Yeah."

Both boys lean down and pick up Remus' fallen texts. Arms fumbling nervously. Hands bumping and pulling away. Hands bumping and lingering.

"Yeah! And I, yeah, I'm just gonna go," Trying to control quite a stupid grin, Sirius points in a direction he hopes leads to the kitchens. "Pudding," he adds while exhaling a forgotten breath.

"Right!" Remus moves into the common room, as Sirius starts down the corridor.

"Right."

Later in the night, after the Marauder's Annual Christmas Eve Celebration, Remus draws open his bed curtains and looks to Sirius' bed. His bed curtains are still drawn open. Having passed out sprawled on his bed, Sirius was unable to draw them closed himself. Sirius had stirred earlier while Remus was trying to swing his legs fully onto his bed. Not wanting to risk waking up his slumbering comrade, he left the curtains open.

Remus stands and starts to walk, to no where in particular he thinks, but his feet take him to the edge of Sirius' bed. There is a great empty void in the bed that looks quite lonely to the half-asleep werewolf. After risking to draw the curtains closed with no ill effects, he gently lifts up the sheets of Sirius' bed and climbs in, all the while staring down at the boy in front of him.

"Ahem," something behind his head clears it's throat.

Remus nearly forgets about the piece of mistletoe that Sirius always hangs on his headboard. He would joke and wink quite dramatically when he said a little mistletoe never hurt anyone, "if you know what I mean," he'd say.

There is a chocolatey smudge on the side of Sirius' mouth. Remus smiles to himself and leans down to meet his friend's face. He gives Sirius a half kiss. Half tasting his lips and the fire whiskey still heavy on his slumbering breath, and half tasting the pudding that decided to set up camp next to his lips.

Sirius wiggles and scratches his stomach before promptly letting out a snore that sounds a bit like a growl.

"Happy Christmas," Remus whispers and soon joins his friend in sleep.

Remus sleeps there until just before dawn when Sirius, always first to wake up on Christmas morning, regardless of how much fire whiskey his body ingested the night before, pounces on him with an excited, "Happy Christmas to you, too, Remus!"

To be coninuted...

A/N: Lol, sorry to get all long on you all of a sudden. I really didn't mean to.


	7. The Ceremony

"Mischief managed," Remus hears a voice whisper before hearing a light tap on parchment. He quickly accios some tissues and wipes away various substances leaking out of his eyes and nose and charms them to levitate over to the nearest trash can. He clears his throat with a louder-than-intended cough.

"Moony?" the voice comes from around the corner. "Remus?" He feels steady, familiar breath on his throat.

"Hmm?" Remus doesn't look up from the spot on the floor between his knees he's fixed his eyes on.

"Remus," Sirius begins, while adjusting himself to sit on the floor next to Remus. "What are you doing here? It's almost time to go."

Remus says nothing, still fixed on the floor.

"Moony, what's wrong?" Sirius brushes the sandy hair out of Remus' face.

"This. All this. It's just… it can't be over. Not this soon." A tear runs down his face as Sirius turns, adjusting himself to face Remus. "No more feasts in the great hall,"

Sirius puts a hand on his boyfriend's shoulder and kisses Remus on one cheek, and then the other.

"No more train rides to kick off September,"

Sirius lifts himself up, finds a spot on his head and kisses it.

"No more late nights and gillyweed,"

Sirius kisses his nose.

"No more Hogsmeade on the weekends"

Sirius lifts up one of Remus' hands and kisses the back of it softly.

"No more no more Shack,"

Sirius moves forward and kisses his forehead.

"No more pranks,"

"Er, well. No more pranks? I wouldn't say that so fast."

"Oh, Merlin, Sirius, what did you do?" Remus sniffles a little and looks at him, worried.

"Well, just do me a favor and when Snivellus is called up, only look at him chin up." Sirius kisses the surprised and still worried looking Remus on his lips. "I might get jealous."

"You," Remus smiles at his boyfriend. "I don't even want to know what you did."

Sirius smiles back at him, deviously.

Remus looks to the floor as his voice becomes serious, "What's going to happen next?"

"Well, we're going to stand up, go out there, get our diplomas, and lie in wait for Snivellus' impending doom."

Remus smiles sadly, "No, I mean, what's going to happen to us? To Peter? To James and Lily? What will become of the Marauders?"

"Well, we will go our separate ways, which we will find to be not so separate after all. You and I will shag each other senseless at every given opportunity. James and I will go into auror training. Peter will go back to living with his mother until she realizes there is a 1 in front of the 8 in his age. She'll probably let him come out and play every so often, though. James and Lily will probably go off and have a gazillion crazy haired babies all of whom we will spoil endlessly."

"Gazillion isn't a number, Padfoot." A smile makes it's way onto Remus' face.

"In any case, Professor Lupin," says Sirius, his hands dancing in Remus' hair. "I'm positive this isn't the last time you'll find yourself here. Don't you worry your pretty little head."

Sirius' face shifts to an expression that is softer than the joking one he's currently wearing.

"Come live with me."

"What?"

"Remember the flat I bought? I want you to come live with me, Moony."

"Oh, Sirius, I…I couldn't. I…"

"I insist." Sirius' smile is unfailing.

"I…" Remus breathes out, knowing there is no use in saying no to Sirius Black when he's already made up his mind. "Of course, Sirius."

As soon as Remus puts the last syllable on his name, Sirius' lips find his own. Remus forgets why he is so worried. He should have known better. He should have known that after all they'd been through these past seven years nothing could break them. Nothing would break the Marauders. Nothing would break the love he felt for the beautiful boy pulling him to his feet, dragging him down the hall toward their graduation ceremony.

* * *

"Remus John Lupin," a black haired witch calls from a podium. Familiar whistles and cat calls erupt from three sections of the audience. Remus stands to make his way to the stage. Through the whistles and yells he can hear a familiar howl. He blushes and smiles brighter that he had been. He looks out over the crowd and picks out the faces of his parents--his mother is crying, and his father, holding up a camera, looks quite proud. He finds Lily, then Peter, and then James, all clapping and smiling brightly. While scanning the audience he finds Snape and is not surprised to see him scowling. He then looks for the face of Sirius Black. He finds his grey eyes while he is in mid-howl. The howl ends and he sees him mouth the words, "I love you," just as he had when Sirius was on the stage minutes earlier. His smile continues as he holds his diploma out in front of him proudly and makes his way down the steps.

A few minutes later, a name is called which grabs the attention of the Marauders. The four look up.

"Severus Snape." A few Slytherins clap before a gasp erupts amongst the entire audience. As Snape stands, he, along with the audience find that his graduation robes have disappeared completely. The only thing still left on his body is his deep green cap, perched on top of his slick black hair, and a pair of skimpy, silk boxer shorts stripped in red and gold.

Sirius barks a clear laugh, and sends an air high five over to James. Peter, a few seats down from James, is laughing uncontrollably and sinking lower in his seat. Remus guffaws and covers his mouth in shock.

To be continued...


	8. The Shack

"Padfoot," a rough, low voice says. "Padfoot, your nails are too long. I can hear you walking around. Come out."

A skinny, messy, black dog steps out from behind a doorframe, it's head lowered.

"Padfoot," A graying Remus begins as the dog turns seamlessly back to his skinny, messy, human counterpart. "Sirius…"

"You could always hear a pin drop in here." His first words to Remus in twelve long years. Sirius places a hand on a gash in the wall of the Shrieking Shack. "It wasn't me. I didn't kill them."

"Sirius," Remus begins.

"Remus," Sirius cuts him off, almost forgetting what he is about to say. The sound of him saying Remus' name and Remus hearing it--the sound of Remus saying his own name. They are mere names, _words_, but it is almost too much to take. Eventually he finds his words. "Hear me out, Remus. I know you probably hate me. Probably… I _know _you hate me. I don't blame you at all. I… it wasn't me. I wasn't the one who killed them."

'_Them,'_ Remus knows he's talking about James and Lily. Something in his heart hurts terribly.

"Sirius," Remus tries to begin, again.

"Just, hear me out, okay?"

"SIRIUS!" Remus yells to make Sirius listen to what he has to say. "Sirius. I know. Peter is here. Harry discovered him on the map. I didn't believe my eyes at first, but our map doesn't lie, does it? You're innocent. I know it. We'll make the world know it."

"Harry?" Sirius has apparently stopped listening after hearing the boy's name.

"Yes."

"He's here? Of course he's here. What…?"

"Yes. Third year, Gryffindor."

"Does he play…?"

"The youngest seeker in one hundred years."

"He has our…?"

"Yes, I think he may have gotten it from the Weasley boys. He has the cloak, too."

"Does he still look…?"

"Just like James. Eyes are green as ever. About this high, I'd say."

"Does he still…" Sirius gestures a finger toward his forehead.

"Yes. You know about the scar?"

"Who doesn't? The first year… in Azkaban… all the new inmates… it's all they talked about. 'The boy who lived,' they called him." Sirius leans against the door frame and slides down to the floor. Tears twelve years in the making burn his cheeks as he realizes just how much of his life has been ripped away from him. He thinks of how much has been taken away from his innocent godson. He wants to put all the blame on Voldemort for killing his best friend. He wants even more to blame Peter for everything; for betraying them. He wants to blame the bystanders for standing so close. He wants to blame Dumbledore somehow. He could put the blame on the stupid Order who all turned on him, refusing to even hear his story. He wants to blame the night, the place, the time, the weather, even Snape just because he never washed his hair, the big nosed git, because he's sure they were all factors somehow, but he winds up where he always does--clinging to his innocence, yet placing the blame wholly on himself.

Remus leans down in front of him, putting a hand gently on his shoulder.

"If I had been there," Sirius says quietly. "If I hadn't insisted on Peter… I should have killed the rat bastard when I had the chance. Then James and Lily would still be--"

"Sirius," Remus says quickly and sternly. "Don't you dare talk like that. I reasoned this all out when I saw Peter's name on that map. It wasn't your fault."

"But it,"

"Shut _up_, Sirius. I don't want to hear that talk from you! Don't be daft, Sirius, it wasn't your fault. _Peter_ is the one who betrayed us. You didn't know about his dedication to Voldemort--none of us did. And I know that if you did, you wouldn't have insisted on him. You would have rather stood outside their door all day, everyday guarding them yourself before putting them in danger like that intentionally."

"Peter. He got away. I let him get away." Sirius looks down.

Remus lifts up his chin. "You didn't let him. He ran. He transformed and ran because he's a coward. It wasn't your fault he got away. You know how fast Wormtail is. He ran to some small space and hid so no one could find him. You couldn't find him, and neither cold anyone else. It's not your fault, Sirius. You're innocent, and we're _going_ to find Peter, and we _will_ clear your name."

"What's funny, is that I know I'm innocent. I know it was Peter, but I just don't feel it. From day one I knew that, but I didn't feel it. I felt guilty every single day. I still feel guilty. Damn it! Harry would still have his parents if I hadn't…"

"Sirius, shut up. That's the Dementors talking. The Dementors confused you and put those wretched thoughts in your head." Remus brings a hand up and moves it along the side of Sirius' head as he looks into his sunken, dark gray eyes. His hair, once blacker than coal, softer than a cloud, and as shiny as the brightest star in the sky, was still just as black as it had always been, but it had a rougher texture and dulled quite a bit. Remus hopes that after a few showers and a few good meals he will begin looking more and more like the boy he fell in love with all those years ago. "Don't let them do this to you," he adds softly, stroking his long lost friend's arm.

"I… I don't know how." Sirius barely finishes.

Remus pulls his now sobbing friend to his chest, making a personal note that after all these years, they still fit together perfectly, just as they had when they were seventeen. He sifts quickly through his expansive vocabulary but comes up with nothing he could say to make Sirius feel better at this moment. All he can do is hold him while he cries, trying not to cry himself.

After a few minutes, Sirius breaks the silence, "Remus," he sniffs. "Moony, what's going to happen?"

"Well," Remus starts softly and quietly. "first we're going to get a good nights sleep tonight. I'll be right next to you for each nightmare you have. I hear they're common after one gets out of Azkaban. Then, in the morning, I'll get you cleaned up: bathed, clothed, fed, and all that. I'll put every locking charm I know on the doors and windows before I head down to Dumbledore's office with the Map and explain everything to him. He'll believe us."

"No," Sirius whines as he tugs on the fabric covering Remus' shoulders. "Don't leave," he nuzzles his nose into Remus' collarbone, trying to drink in the scent he forgot he loved so much.

"I'll owl him then? Soon as I can. I'll tell him it's important. Is that alright?"

Sirius nods in response. "After that?"

"Well," Remus thinks while stroking flat, stringy black hair "After that, Dumbledore will help us catch Peter, and he will talk to Fudge at the Ministry, and he will go around and convince the right people of your innocence… then the world. You'll be safe then. You won't have to hide."

They sit in silence once more.

"Remus?"

"Sirius?"

Sirius pulls himself away from the comfortable spot on Remus' chest and looks into his aged, but still twinkling amber eyes. "Do you still…" he stops, unsure if he wants to continue with his question.

Remus' lips find one of Sirius' dirty, tear-stained cheeks, and then the other in an attempt to calm Sirius' nerves somehow. Sirius winces a little at the gesture, having not had such intimate contact in so long. Remus persists. His lips find their way slowly to a spot just above Sirius' ear. They brush against an eyelid as they reach his slender nose. "Yes?" Remus asks Sirius, who has forgot he even began a sentence, who has forgotten everything but the feel of Remus' arms around him and his lips moving about on his skin. Remus draws one of Sirius' hands to his lips. "Do I still what?"

Sirius shuts his eyes tight as Remus pushed his lips firmly to his forehead. "Moony, do you still love me?"

Remus pulls his lips away from Sirius' forehead and looks into his eyes for a moment, saying nothing. Remus kisses Sirius on the mouth. Sirius doesn't kiss back. Neither question why. Remus resolves that maybe he forgot how, remembering the way he staggered as he walked, as if he had just learned. Sirius knows that it is a mixture of, unfortunately, forgetting how to respond, and also of pure surprise that someone as kind and warm and gentle and _'so perfect'_ he thinks, could want to hold and kiss the old, filthy, cold shell of a man he had become. A shell with another man's misplaced guilty conscience hovering over head. A shell whose only occupants the past twelve years have been countless screaming nightmares, one sliver of hope and one large, whimpering dog.

Remus pulls away and looks into Sirius' eyes once more. "From the moment I met you, I never stopped."

Sirius smiles his first real smile in years. It is not very wide, not toothy, but it's the best he can do. He is not worried about it, or self-conscious, or anything like that because he knows that he will have plenty of practice in this, and all the other things he's forgotten to do in the coming days.

They spend the next few hours of the night against the wall in the Shack. Sirius falls asleep in Remus' arms and as promised, Remus is there to calm him down from every painful nightmare.

_Fin_

**A/N**: Oh, boy. It's over! This chapter is probably a smidgen AU, because I didn't check PoA before I posted it. Sorry. :/

Anyway, thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! And thank you to anyone who has reviewed and anyone who might in the future. I appreciate it. :D


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